Friday, December 2, 2011

#88 - Generic Holiday Names

Why is it that we can have specific names for secular holidays - Martin Luther King Jr Day, Columbus Day, Independence Day, Labor Day, Veteran's Day?  And when it comes to religious holidays like Christmas & Hanukkah, we suddenly have to group them together and simply say, "Happy Holidays" because it may offend someone to say Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah.  OK, so I get that you may not know if I am a Christian or a Jew, so you wouldn't know which greeting to give.  So to remedy this situation, here are a few suggestions:
1. All those who are Christian and celebrate the birth of our Lord should wear a cross.
2. All those who celebrate the arrival of Santa should wrap a string of lights around their heads.
3. All those who are Jewish and celebrate Hanukkah, the festival of lights, should have a menorrah sticking out of the top of their head.
4. All those who are Jewish and celebrate the 8 days of Hanukkah, commemorating the rededication of the Temple in Jerusalem, should wear a Star of David.
5. All those who do not celebrate either of the above simply wear a sign that says "Seasons Greetings Only Here" so you do not feel left out.


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